Secrets of Networking, Part 1

The first set of points is from a blog by Charlie Robertson, www.charliethecoach.co.uk, who is with BNI. Charlie is apparently quoting from the book “Deserve What You Get” by Jay Levinson. The gist of the blog is 10 ways that you can increase the Word of Mouth techniques to help others talk about you in a positive way. Another way of putting this would be to review the  non-verbal actions that impact your brand.

While this list is by no means complete, I think it is worth reviewing.

What does “Word of Mouth” have to do with networking? It has everything to do with your brand and the brand extension of what others see in you and think of you. So, here are a series of blogs on the list Charlie cites from the book, “Deserve What You Get.”

1. Keeping Promises – the number one reason relationships fail, at work, or at home, is that one side perceives a promise that isn’t kept. If you want the relationship to succeed, you have to find out what the expectations are and meet them or change the expectations. You must prioritize your promises and you must make your priorities known.

This goes back to the concept of trust. “Can I trust you to keep your promise?” Clearly the idea of meeting or exceeding expectations is worth a book by itself. Eventually, you will get caught if you lie, deceive, or misrepresent. The onus is on you to go the next step to see if the expectations that you promised are kept.

The first challenge is that the expectations that you thought you made may not match what the other party thought you communicated. The author is correct in saying that this intentional or unintentional gap is a major reason for not succeeding.

The author is also correct in suggesting that you must manage your commitments and correcting others who want to “assign” you with commitments that you did not make. This happens in consulting when the hiring company expands job scope, without wanting to pay for it, and expecting you to comply (at your cost). This happens when a boss gives you an impossible assignment, with the time and resources that you have available. This happens when a family is pulling you one way with their set of expectations (spelled “demands”) and work is pulling you the other way.

The key is to decide who you are, what your values are, and to prioritize what you can and cannot do. There are certain promises that are seen as so fundamental, usually tied to character, that failure can be catastrophic. Of the rest, it is best to either not make a promise or to be sure that you condition it with reality.

Why? You don’t want to develop the reputation (brand) of not being trustworthy.