Breaking the Chain of Anger

The opposite of feeling guilty is feeling that someone else or something else is guilty.

It may be that someone else was wicked, evil, and malicious. That does happen but not most of the time. Terminating people is hard. Families are impacted. Sometimes downsizing just has to be done. Today, the company or industry may be on it’s back.

While it is nice to know if the cause was greedy Wall Street, corrupt Congress, the main street banker, or nasty boss. It is what it is. It is done. Over. Finale.

So, you have options. You can go postal – not normally recommended. You can live life angry, raise your blood pressure, harm others, and eventually die a miserable wretch. You can suppress your anger, put a smile on your face and live with unresolved issues (chains) that will keep you from being all that you can be

It is time to take the chip off your shoulder. But how do we break the chain?

I recommend you start by writing down everyone and everything that you are angry about. If your anger is so great that you are striking out at others or yourself, then you may wish to consider professional help. Writing out what is going on is a good start for even professional counseling.

Second, I recommend you look at every item that you are angry over and divide it into categories. Category A is those things that you cannot change. For example, I cannot change the current global financial crisis. Category B is those people whom you cannot get near. For example, the President of the United States or FED chairman would probably not entertain my house call. Category C is those things that you can influence. For example, writing a civil letter to the Prime Minister or Congressman expressing your concerns is good civic duty. Category D is those people whom you can influence. For example, you can go to your former boss – and forgive him/her.

What? Forgive? Yes. Breaking the chain is not waiting for them to apologize or make restitution. That seldom happens. They may not even feel like they did anything wrong. But the chain is on you. The wasted energy spent in anger is your energy. Breaking the chain requires you to forgive the offending party. If the other party is wrong – that is their problem. You can get free of your chain by forgiving them.

You might need help. For me, that help is usually through prayer and seeking supernatural help. Life sometimes is not fair and it is comforting to know that there is a bigger plan going on than I can see. Choose to release the chain of anger.

How do you handle anger?